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Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Tuesday, November 10 1998
I keep extremely busy at work, so much so that I almost never check my Spies email or do any work on my own web projects while I'm in the workplace. For some reason (and I never expected to be this way) I thrive on productivity. I am the very model of your ideal information-age salary slave: I find ways to automate my (and everyone else's) repetitive tasks and I enjoy the challenge of everything left for me to do. I like my job so much that admitting how much I enjoy it is kind of embarrassing. Really guys, I'm not such a complete dork.
On the ride home tonight I saw a very ugly young woman at a gas station and it suddenly occurred to me that a person's attractiveness is completely unrelated to her desire to have sex.
Kim had bottle of wine and a nugget of fine marijuana waiting for me when I made it back to the cabana. But she'd put herself through a lot of trouble to get it, and I don't think the dope was worth it. Let me explain.
Kim now works at an extremely classy massage establishment in downtown San Diego, a place called the Victoria Rose. It caters mostly to wealthy men and is staffed mostly by attractive young female massage people. The other day Kim gave a massage to a 30-something guy who, judging from his conversation, seemed to Kim like a possible marijuana connection. So when he invited her to visit him today at his place up in Escondito, she agreed to go. But things got just a little too weird for her once she arrived. The guy greeted her at the door wearing a torn up old Korn tee shirt and immediately gave her a kiss on the cheek. Then led her back into his house. The windows were all boarded up, the walls were decorated with Slayer posters, swords and knives, and the music, well, it was dark 80s speed metal. Everything was kind of scary, but in a tawdry cheesy sort of way. Kim smoked the guy's pot, which was kind buds, the sort of substance she's been looking for. But, not being used to it, she soon found herself in a paranoid state of mind. The guy wouldn't leave her alone, if you know what I mean, and when she mentioned that she had a boyfriend and wasn't interested in his advances, he said that she was beautiful and he couldn't keep from hitting on her. She was so creeped out that she finally found herself bypassing normal pot culture protocol. She told him that she wanted that last bowl packed "to go."
So this evening, after a dinner of chili, Kim and I lay around in bed drinking vino and smoking the hard-won kind bud. We were so messed up that she inevitably spilled her wine all over her white comforter. I rushed the comforter into the bathroom and (following Kim's instructions) ran cold water over the stain. But it held its ground and looked for all the world to be permanent. I rubbed a blue stone (one of Kim's hippie nature relics) over the stain, hoping in vain that its blueness would (in a mystical mumbo-jumbo way) somehow cancel the redness of the stain. But then (in something akin to desperation) I turned on the hot water. Miraculously the purplish redness of the stain melted away in a few seconds and was completely gone. I don't know if the cold water helped start the process or not, but the hot water was very important in completing it.
All teevee is delightful when you've been smoking kind buds, so I'm my opinions on what I watched tonight are probably not of much value. But I would like to say something about Buffy the Vampire Slayer. For me, tonight's episode had real potential for a while. Certain aspects of it reminded me a lot of the Simpsons actually. For example, the town itself constitutes a kind of plastic character (or meta-character, if you prefer) whose actions play an important role in the trajectory of the plot. But of course, unlike the Simpsons, the town's antics aren't calculated to induce laughter. Indeed, tonight's Buffy the Vampire Slayer for a time seemed to be exploring the shocking depths of the evil, unlucky side of the human condition. But then it just stopped working for me and turned into a videogame. The action boiled up out of control from beneath the characters and plot and overwhelmed it all in a repulsive orgy of non-entertaining violence.
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