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playing someone else's Tinder
Friday, April 22 2016
location: West Hollywood, California
The weekly all-hands meeting happened this morning in the basement conference room of the main office. Those working remote all called in it seemed Ja took attendance of all those people. Then we each took turns making a brief statement about our work this week, with the proviso that we keep things short, uplifting, and "snackable." Otherwise we were urged to say "pass." It seemed expected that, as a new hire, I say something, so I said simply that it was great to work with so many motivated and talented people. Most of the things said by others were about positive outcomes on obscure campaigns. The ritual reminded me of "Energy" (also a Friday routine) from my days at CollegeClub.com (my first west coast dotcom employer), though it was less cloying and marginally less cultish.
We in the IT department all went out to a nearby Chinese place for lunch called Kung Pao Bistro, and ordered food family-style. Somehow the topic of religion came up and it turned out that everyone in the IT department is an atheist. I've never been in a workplace like that before! "It's because we're the kind who don't pull the wool over our eyes," said Jo.
I spent the afternoon implementing a CSV button in the backend donor search tool, and it was exactly the kind of web work that I most prefer. At some point I took a 40 milligram dose of Vyvanse to gauge how it would affect me two days in a row (something I normally carefully avoid, though all rules are suspended when I travel). As expected, it further improved my focus and enjoyment of the work, though it felt half as intense as the 50 milligrams had felt yesterday. That's how quickly the body adapts to a regime of attention deficit disorder medication.
Originally the plan had been for the IT department to all do something social together on Saturday (indeed, I'd extended my stay in Los Angeles a day for it), but in the end the only day that worked for everyone was today. Gradually we'd decided to take a long walk (since Jo hates automobiles and doesn't even own one) to a vegan restaurant called Real Food Daily (to the southwest) and have dinner there. So after dinner, we set off on foot west down Santa Monica Blvd.
It wasn't long before we came upon an odd sight: a crazy weather-beaten blind guy flailing a cane out in the street. I didn't think much of it until a woman driving by yelled at us to do something about it. Oh right, blind people shouldn't be walking around in the middle of Santa Monica Blvd! So before I thought much about it, I reflexively ran over, grabbed the guy by the arm, and tugged him over to the curb. "I'm alright, I'm alright, leave me alone!" he shouted. "There's the sidewalk right there," I said. Once he made it over the curb, I was content to keep walking. Evidently Jo and Ca knew this guy well and have seen him in the street many times, though evidently nothing bad has ever come of it. Predictable, as he does when telling his underlings how their work needs improvement, Jo made me feel stupid for having tried to rescue the guy, pointing out that I should "always announce yourself." But really, it had just been a reflex. I hadn't thought about it at all.
The Vyvanse kept me from second guessing myself for long, and I had good long chats with both Jo and Ca for most of the rest of the walk. The weather was great, with a cool breeze blowing in from the ocean.
Based on its name, I rather expected Real Food Daily to be a nuts and berries kind of place, but no, they had a great assortment of vegan junkfood. Because the Vyvanse was suppressing my appetite, I only ordered the fries and happy hour sliders, though the fries were huge and would've been sufficient entirely on their own. As for drinks, it was clear at this point that Jo is extremely anti-alcohol, and indeed The Organization itself refuses to reimburse for alcohol expenses. But it was Friday, I was on Vyvanse, and I didn't care what Jo thought. So I was the first to order an alcoholic beverage, some sort of IPA, the first of what would be two beers. Happily, Ca followed suit, and later Da ordered a glass of wine. In the end, The Organization paid for all of the meal save for the alcohol, and Ca insisted on paying for the alcohol. During dinner and for part of the walk back, most of my conversation was with Ni. I suspect the combination of alcohol and Vyvanse made me just a bit too talkative and confessional.
After the others peeled off, Da and I walked back to the intern apartment, and I quickly mixed myself a screwdriver. I'd offered one to Da last night and he'd said he doesn't drink booze, but tonight after such a stressful first week, he was willing to drink some more wine. There was a bottle of passable Cabernet on the back of the stove, so he poured a glass of that. Soon we were joined by Ky, whose weird Ayurvedic diet had kept him from eating any of the foods we've been eating. According to Ky, the diet also forbids alcohol, something he claimed not to drink anyway. But he saw us drinking and suddenly decided to come out of his seemingly life-long dry period to join us. It was a huge honor, though I didn't want him to feel any sort of pressure. He found some dusty beers in the back of the cabinet above the fridge and, not really knowing what to expect, asked us if he should eat something before drinking one of those.
An hour later, we were still drinking wine and beer, and Ky introduced me to the phone app called Tinder, the one where you are shown pictures of possible mates and your task is to swipe left to indicate they aren't attractive and right to indicate that they are. For some reason, Ky wanted me to play Tinder for awhile under his account, so I accepted and rejected a course of at least 100 women. At some point in this, Da spontaneously fell asleep, which, giving his unrelenting energy, was something of a unicorn in time. At that point Ky and I decided to head off to bed. Since Ni was gone for the evening, I got to sleep alone in the room that had been hers.
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