Your leaking thatched hut during the restoration of a pre-Enlightenment state.

 

Hello, my name is Judas Gutenberg and this is my blaag (pronounced as you would the vomit noise "hyroop-bleuach").



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Like my brownhouse:
   nutrient or a poison
Monday, January 17 2000
I had the day off from work because it was Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Last year I didn't have this day off, but now that my employer aspires to be a big corporation with racially-benign connotations, Martin Luther King Jr. Day is no longer one of those neglected holidays like Columbus Day. There may not be a big tradition behind Martin Luther King Jr. Day, but there's no reason such a tradition can't be started, beginning with '00. I could have been like my tireless colleagues and gone to work anyway, but I was in Los Angeles in the aftermath of a tantric photo shoot. And Martin Luther King Jr. is as worthy of a holiday as Jesus Christ. Think of all the days people get off for that bleeding sanctimonious long haired fucker.
In every habitat, healthy stability depends on the constancy of certain environmental factors. Remove one of these factors, be it a nutrient or a poison, and suddenly a repressed organism can seize the day and elbow aside the neighbors. These days, I think my healthy bacterial balance depends on my nightly brandy-sipping habit. Two days without brandy had Kim telling me to brush my teeth after I'd already brushed my teeth, if you know what I mean.
There was a plan afoot today for Corynna to give Kim and me one of her tantric sessions. I like Corynna and all and am certainly not repelled by her in the least, but I had my doubts I could soberly do anything intimate or tantric with such a complete stranger, so I nixed the idea as pleasantly as I could.
Instead, Evan, Corynna, Anthea, Kim and I all went out to a fancy restaurant for a breakfast of mimosas and lunchy food. We made for an elegant LA contingent, arriving in a black BMW which was dispatched by valet. The waitress, who I suspected was Haitian, seated us at the most prominent table in the place.
Mind you, I'm still not into this tantric spiritual stuff, but these powerful, intelligent, polyamourous women who call themselves goddesses are great fun to hang out with. Their combination of decadence and spirituality (only in LA!) rather reminds me of the days of Big Fun. I particularly appreciate Anthea's personality; she has a Warholesque sense of whimsy and wonder rare in the general population.
Back at Corynna's, we found ourselves watching an extremely dull videotape of one of Corynna's tantric sessions. It was all shot from the same angle and the audio was sort of weak. It was in desperate need of some serious editing, and this is how I felt while stoned on marijuana! While I kept my thoughts pretty much to myself, Corynna was expressing these sentiments out loud. Evan, who had made the "movie" for people to download from the web, shrugged and said that that was how Corynna had originally wanted it. It's fascinating watching this combination of homebrew and commercial in action. Nobody seems to know exactly what to do next, so everything is being tried. Some things work, some things don't. Unlike most internet enterprises, Goddess Temple is profitable, so there's room for experimentation.
Unexpectedly, Kim and I were actually paid for our modeling work. I received a $100 check and Kim received a voucher for $500 worth of advertising on the Goddess Temple website. As a goddess, you see, Kim will be providing tantra-flavoured therapy sessions for the sexually misdirected, sexually defective, sexually unevolved, sexually immature and sexually desperate of the world. Her connections to these people will be made over the internet. This business model has already proven itself extremely lucrative and Kim can't wait to set up shop as San Diego's principle goddess.
It's interesting to observe how Corynna acculturates her new goddesses into the "goddess movement." She starts by having them pose nude for photos to be featured in a subscription-only part of her website, has them participate in a few tantric therapy sessions, and eventually they set up their own practice while advertising their services on Corynna's site. But not just any therapist is goddess material. "I had a large group of potential apprentices when I agreed to apprentice you," she told Kim, "but you and one other woman were the only ones I kept." Kim, Corynna said, has lots of "Shakti energy," the energy of the principle goddess of the Hindu religion.
By the time Kim and I made it back to San Diego, there was little we wanted to do but sleep.



For linking purposes this article's URL is:
http://asecular.com/blog.php?000117

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