Your leaking thatched hut during the restoration of a pre-Enlightenment state.


Hello, my name is Judas Gutenberg and this is my blaag (pronounced as you would the vomit noise "hyroop-bleuach").


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   costume shopping in Kingston, NY
Friday, October 28 2005
Today was Fitzmas, the day when the Santa Claus of Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald would, with great merriment and a hearty ho ho ho, hand out the black coals of indictments to the grinches of Neoconservatism, indirectly stuffing a great bounty into the stockings of anyone with any sense. There wasn't much news this morning, but later in the day it turned out that Fitzmas was nothing more than the indictment of Scooter Libby. The sweet sweet justice of the Karl Rove frog march will have to wait. Still, it's bad form to be disappointed when one doesn't get everything one wants for Whatevermas.

Tomorrow Gretchen and I would be attending a Halloween party and we needed costumes. Gretchen claims she does a really good Yoko Ono impression, and at first the idea had been that I could be John Lennon (particularly now that I have such a full mane of hair). But that was too cliché for me, so I decided to be Mick Jagger instead, whom I more closely resemble. Our act would be Mick and Yoko having an affair, with us feeling confident that at a party this small and intimate we could pull it off without anything ending up in the tabloids.
To get the supplies we'd need for our outfits, we headed into Kingston and made our first stop at Columbia Beauty Supply, which features an extensive selection of masks, wigs, makeup, and an encyclopedic costume section. The latter includes an entire rack labeled simply "Pimps & Hos". As you might imagine, today the store was jam-packed with shoppers. Gretchen bought a long black witch's wig and I bought some face paint in case I needed to exaggerate nascent Jaggeresque features.
I didn't really find the core of my costume until we went to the Kingston Salvation Army, where Gretchen found me a perfectly good pair of vinyl pants in the women's section, and they fit me like a glove (they were $5). I also found a nice pair of black shoes for any occasion and they also fit perfectly ($6). Meanwhile Gretchen had found bell bottom bluejeans and a turtleneck sweater. She absolutely hates turtlenecks, by the way, but this was Halloween.
Next we went to the Goodwill out on 9W, where Gretchen found me the closest thing to a flashy 60s-style shirt. It had enormous starched cuffs and fairly wide lapels. Again, for some reason it had been in the women's section.
Our most interesting find in the Goodwill was a Delonghi Café Capri cappuccino maker priced at $15. Impulsively, we bought the thing, not even sure whether it worked.

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