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Hello, my name is Judas Gutenberg and this is my blaag (pronounced as you would the vomit noise "hyroop-bleuach").



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   Ramona and Neville's big bear adventure
Wednesday, June 22 2016
The dogs disappeared into the forest this evening as they almost always do, and I didn't think much more about it until I was splitting some of that salvaged White Ash I'd cut up the other day. Off in the distance to the west, I could hear them (or, more accurately, Ramona) barking. So I got Gretchen and we set off to retrieve them. They'd probably treed a bear and Ramona might just stay out there all night barking. About a third of a mile from home, we came upon Neville, who (not being as interested in bears), quickly joined us. Ramona, though, continued her barking beyond the nearby bushes, out of view. Eventually, though, the commotion of our presence snapped something in her brain, and she came over to us. We missed that opportunity to grab her and she quickly ran back to where she'd been. This might've given whatever she'd treed (which was now almost certainly a bear) a chance to escape, because her movements were now much more confused. Somehow we managed to call her back, and this time I leashed her and we began marching home through the deepening dusk. [Later I would discover a nine-inch scratch on Ramona's right shoulder. The scratch never penetrated the skin and mostly resulted in acute local swelling. Such a scratch couldn't've come from anything but an interaction with a bear.]
Afterwards I jokingly gave voice to Neville's opinion on the matter back when he in Ramona still had the bear treed. I had him saying, "Can we go home now? I'm tired of the bear and I'm thirsty and I'm hungry." To this, I had Ramona reply, "It will only be about five more minutes and then I'll have this bear all trussed up!"


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