Enemies (and perhaps worse still, friends) are known to read the musings.

I


n the early afternoon I went around responsibly attending to business matters: picking up my paycheck and paying this month's rent in person. All required movement was done on bicycle.

Today we of Kappa Mutha Fucka were to set out on a trip to New York City to visit Diana and Virginia. In my last musings, I said some of my housemates were going. But I wasn't being completely truthful; actually all of my housemates were going. I didn't think it good policy to announce that our house was to be left unattended all weekend long. Enemies (and perhaps worse still, friends) are known to read the musings.

Rory, the British C&O waiter, had managed to convince Deya to bring him along on the trip as well. But apparently Diana is left with lingering bad memories of her first meeting him, and today she called to say she didn't want him coming up with us.

I hadn't mentioned this because I hadn't seen it, but according to Matthew Hart, Rory had been seen sucking (or trying to suck) on Diana's toes while in blackout the eventful night of the car theft.

But when Matthew called Rory and broke the bad news, Rory said he could make other arrangements to stay with someone else he knows in the Big Apple. So the plans remained and he would be coming with us. This was the makings for a highly uncomfortable road trip: six people (5 Aquarii and a Gemini). We were to be taking Deya's car, the one with the Rory Memorial Clutch.

Always the most on-the-edge and violent, Matthew and Leah could be heard slamming, shouting, squealing and cursing throughout the house.

As we packed prior to leaving the house, we all, especially Matthew Hart and Leah, were under considerable stress. We were saying horrible things about each other behind each others' backs. Always the most on-the-edge and violent, Matthew and Leah could be heard slamming, shouting, squealing and cursing throughout the house. At the slightest conversational exchange, they erupted into brutal arguments repeatedly. I HATED them so much and considered just staying home. The miserable prospect of riding in a cramped station wagon for seven hours as Matthew and Leah fought over, for example, subtle and possibly unfriendly tonal nuances in Leah's voice, had me slamming doors as well.

Deya came home from work at 7:30pm, what was supposed to be the moment of our departure. We didn't hit the road until 9pm.

At a Taco Bell somewhere up 29 North, Rory suddenly experienced an epiphany and decided not to continue on with us. Sitting on the edge of the parking lot, he looked miserably isolated, as though he might start crying. It seems the pain of rejection from Diana and Verge had finally begun to reach the surface. We all felt empathy for him as we continued on to the north and he turned to ride back home to the darkened south on his lonely inline skates.

T


he music was the Pogues and then a recording of Raphæl and Zachary playing acoustic songs such as the oft-requested "Rain Gorgeous." As we approached Washington DC, we played In on the Killtaker by the DC band Fugazi. That particular album has grown on me a lot recently. The only thing that sucks about Fugazi is that they are a bunch of self-righteous straight edgers who don't drink, smoke, fuck, or eat meat, and don't want anyone else to. Next thing you know, they'll be telling me not to play my music so loud.

The Haffenreffers had nice wide mouths on them, and were fairly easy for a guy like me to piss in when my bladder filled.

We were drinking 32 oz Haffenreffers and 12 oz Budweisers, tossing the empties out on the road as we finished them. The Haffenreffers had nice wide mouths on them, and were fairly easy for a guy like me to piss in when my bladder filled. Unlike past times when Leah felt the need to demonstrate her gender wasn't necessarily urinationally disabled, this time she urinated only the few times we pulled over for more substantial group pissings.

I climbed into the way back part of Deya's car and found myself sleeping nicely. Somewhere on the New Jersey Turnpike, someone suspected Matthew was going the wrong way, and (predictably) a fight erupted with Leah. They were hitting each other and Matthew was swerving. It was ridiculous, juvenile, and not the least bit entertaining. I demanded that they stop. Matthew threatened to kick my ass and I said I'd like to see him do so. So he stopped the car and came around back. I laughed and said, "Oh, you're a redneck now?" He threw a sweatshirt at me. But I won; a much more calm and collected Deya drove in Matthew's place and I went back to sleep.

---

They had the satisfaction of saying that Wonderboy is banned from our house.

O


ne of the things we discussed on the ride was the fact that Wonderboy Neek has skipped town. Apparently the cops have the rather foolish notion that he masterminded a recent wave of Charlottesville car burglaries in which the youthful alterna-lad Sherridan was a suspect. The cops even went so far as to grill Matthew and Leah as to Wonderboy's whereabouts. They had the satisfaction of saying that Wonderboy is banned from our house. Meanwhile Sherridan, who was facing BIG TROUBLE for the stolen loot found in his house, has been cleared of all wrong for "lack of evidence."

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