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motivation legs Wednesday, March 28 2007
I wonder what it is in the human brain that makes it so creative when it is striving to avoid starting into a seemingly-unpleasant task. I've been to this situation many times, and it's resulted in mobiles hanging from my ceiling, crazy nonsense websites, stacks of additional shelving, brand new forest trails, wacky plumbing projects, copper lamps, peculiar Linux installations, and even a drying racks full of clean dishes. I frequently make the mistake of thinking that if only I make myself a pot of coffee, then I will find the motivation to get started on the thing that needs doing. But it never works that way. The coffee gives me delusional euphoria leading me to think I still have plenty of time, and so I launch into something additional unrelated project instead. Worst of all, though, is when I keep surfing over the same four or five websites looking for something new to read, a something that often fails to materialize within the shrinking window of my reduced attention span.
I think my worst-ever episode of procrastination came near the end of the year 2000, when I was working for Launch.com, and had been given the unenviable assignment of "lead developer" on a project to build a version of that music site targeted at an audience in the United Kingdom. There was so much that needed doing that I didn't know where to start, and so I did nothing at all for literally weeks on end. I'd sit in my cubicle day after day, and sure, I looked busy. But what was I actually doing? It's hard to say, but it was in no way work-related. Somehow, though, eventually I found my motivation legs and got to work. I never worked all that hard on the project, but I worked hard enough. The project inevitably died, of course, but it had nothing to do with me. It was just yet another casualty of dotcom overextension, a common malady in those heady days.
My latest problem with procrastination stems from work on yet another grandiose site, one for which I must do everything from graphics to database design. There are so many variables and possibilities that I'm finding myself daunted, discouraged, and unmotivated. Hopefully I can find my way out of this malaise, but for the past few days, I've done nothing but procrastinate.
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